Review – Past Lives (2023) directed by Celine Song.
Watched on January 1st, 2024
Rating: 5/5 Stars
A feeling that's consistently on my mind and in my heart is the reminiscence and occasional ache for the way things in the past. The way passions once felt. A particular moment in time with a group of friends. The feeling of experiencing college for the first time. The innocence and naive aspiration I felt as a middle schooler, high schooler even. How exciting it was to first discover my love for film. I miss the past in so many ways. With that, I sometimes think about the choices and circumstances that put me where I am. How did I get here, sitting in a classroom in Charleston, South Carolina learning about search engine optimization. How did I get here, sitting with a bunch of strangers I've only just met until 2, 3 in the morning with an imminent 9AM the next day? How did I get here, standing on a mini-stage talking to a ton of college students about the film we're all about to watch in a club that I lead at an official university? How did I get here, leading a town hall for my entire high school giving motivational pep-talks about having a positive mental attitude? How did I get here, with the friends I have, the family I have, and the dreams I have? Where would I be if I was elsewhere?
Yet none of this is to say that I have a deep dissatisfaction with the present or desire to change any strong decisions I made that led me to this moment in my life. A lot of things do happen for a reason, and many good things at that. But sometimes there is still that feeling. It's scary to get old, and grow further and further away from your childhood, your past, and you "golden days." It's the first day of 2024 and all my mind wants to do is think about the past year and ultimately the past as a whole. Somehow, this movie captured so much of the feelings and occasional fear I have about life, the past, and the future.
This movie so beautifully captured the realistic heartbreak and emotional complexity of the "what-could-have-been." The "wrong place, wrong time." The "in past lives, we were something else." And not in a way that feels cliche or too much like fantasy; life is tough, and this movie handles its emotions and intricacies so delicately and so rawly.
I recently read the first book for pleasure (AKA not for school or required reading) that I've read since the 8th grade (almost 8 years ago). It was called Tomorrow and Tomorrow and Tomorrow. It's another story about two friends who meet and bond as kids, following their relationship over the course of 30 years. Not only was it the first book I've read in a while, but it has almost instantly become one of my favorite books I've ever read. And while it's a wholly different story with different vibes and narratives, I find so many similarities between these two stories I connect with so deeply and personally. Time goes on. Sometimes it works out like in the movies and in dreams, other times it's strange and weird with worthy highs and shocking lows. Both of these stories capture that truth so clearly, but neither feel too pessimistic or negative in their execution or outlook. Sometimes life is strange, and that's okay.
In terms of the film itself, it's just so beautiful. Every shot is framed so immaculately, the lighting is just gorgeous, and the coloring and grade of the film is so crisp and jumps out at you for you to feel. Paired with touching and inspiring performances and a devastating beautiful score, and you've got perhaps my favorite movie of the year. Celine Song made something so special and I'm so unbelievable impressed and inspired.
I worry about the mistakes I made. Choices I should've made differently. Things that have altered the future in ways that I live out today. But it puts you down the path you go. And it's okay to ache for the "what-could-have-beens," whatever they are for you. I'm not entirely sure how much of what I'm saying is directly related to the film, and how much of my feelings from this movie are blending with my feelings reminiscing about the past year. In spite of all these paragraphs, I'm not even sure how much of it relates to the film's messages and themes. All I know is this: this movie has touched me in ways that I'll carry for a long time. It's a movie I'm coming back, again and again, to express and explain feelings that are indescribable and unexplainable, but are real and okay. It's okay to miss the way things were or could have been. And that shouldn't take anything away from the present and doesn't mean that you're not in the right place of have done anything wrong. Sometimes things turn out differently than we first imagine or first hope for. And that's okay.
Check out the original review posted on Letterboxd here.
